Sunday 30 March 2014

Back to reality..

it's time back to reality.. 
lots to share about but before this..
i need to rush for my things to be done first T.T



Went to take TOEIC exam this morning..
entered the hall without doing any earlier preparation !!
hopefully can pass it.. 
god bless me please!


i sent my family to airport friday morning,
and i ended up with the tears on my face otw going back to dorm..
so shameful but still cant hold back ..
hate separation thou i've been gone through it so many times before.
something makes me more emo and sad after i discovered things inside my wardrobe.




--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I remember it now, it takes me back to when it all first started
But I've only got myself to blame for it, and I accept it now
It's time to let it go, go out and start again
But it's not that easy

But I've got high hopes, it takes me back to when we started
High hopes, when you let it go, go out and start again
High hopes, when it all comes to an end
But the world keeps spinning around


addicted to this song recently haha.. 
k la.. gonna continue with my homework and assignment after leaving them for a week. 
need something sweet to destress myself again ><!!




throwback the moment when i was with my family in nami island.
i can always be the craziest and the sampatest in front of them
no more fake smile or any mask to be put on.
hopefully i could also find and treat someone the ways how i treat my family in the future as well ^^
kthxbai. 

Wednesday 19 March 2014

2014三月中~

那天和housemates他们一起打扫家, 
住了在同一间屋子四年, 有史以来看到最最最干净的状态哈哈~
我没想到他们还真的打扫到酱仔细~ 
也是好, 至少现在家还算是个家, 虽然我很少在客厅里做事情, 
但看到酱干净心情也会变好的咧~

还有就是和他们一起聊天到凌晨2点~
其实到最后我有点游神了, 真的很累,耳朵也自动shutdown了哈哈。。
只有有件事真的有吓到我,
我知道我宿舍这里有着很多自杀事件,虽然很多都被盖了过去~
只有学校里的人才知道~
但我真的不知道原来还有很多性侵的事情发生咧, 
housemate 还讲就是因为这个所以才装了那么多警察的电话亭在每栋宿舍附近。。
本来我以为只是可能有偷东西事件还有侵入者才安装的, 
但原来不止那样~
吓到是因为有时候想吹风的时候都会自己一个人从后门走下山去~
而且最近每次都是差不多晚上10点多, 或者是9点多出去。。
去年有时候做功课还是读书到一半很stress的时候11点多才出去也有~所以听到有这样的事情的时候我有傻眼下。。
可以改掉这个习惯吗? 我也不知道。
不想,就是有时候不想呆在宿舍才出去的,
如果连出去都不能的话, 我想我真的会疯掉吧?
还是以后改时间?
可我想应该也不会有什么事情发生吧?
那么久了, 我真的没遇见过任何的状况~choi!!!
我唯一喜欢这里的就是它的治安, 现在告诉我这样子的事情,
要我如何接受啊? !!!!!!!
不想连这个唯一私人空间的自由也被没收掉~







现在在想着topic给明天的discussion~
每个人要想两个题目, 而我只想到一个!
我明明记得那天突然间想到另外一个了的, 可是此时此刻的我
竟然想不起了!!!! 天啊, 我到底是有多健忘?
真的很想吐, 这个sem很多的presentation, 很多的thesis还有report要写~
虽然没有考试, 可是还是很stress~!! 尤其是星期二还有星期四的과기글。。
不懂做么想到它我就很压力,每次到前一天晚上我就很stress了~
想到第二天要面对的人, 想到他们我就。。。
算了算了, 该过去的还是会过去。
要怎样就怎样吧他们, 真心不喜欢我的组员们~
还要面对他们这个学期咳~~~~~~~~~~

不行, 不可以不喜欢他们,
越不喜欢越讨厌一个人就会和他们越有缘分~
所以不可以讨厌他们!!
虽然变不了喜欢, 至少对他们要毫无感觉, 因为我不想跟他们有缘再见面哈哈!
不知道你是否有试过?
因为我的经验告诉我真是如此,
每次都会和你不喜欢的人同组的!
而自己喜欢的人从来没有一次会和我有缘><!
从中学开始一直就是这样~

所以就是说如果想要和某个人有缘只要讨厌他就行了?
酱好笑咩?





p/s: 那天很好笑, 因为我的部门早上有个专属外国人的聚会, 教授想要知道我们在这里的情况还有问题等等~ 早上9点开始, 好久都没这么早醒来去上课了, 所以那天真的很blur没睡醒, 当我一开门进去班上的时候, 教授问了一句:“ are you undergraduate?" 。。 我竟然告诉他我不是! !天, 然后还傻傻的突然补上一句韩文告诉他说我是学士的。。 那句话一出的时候, 全班笑翻了。。 重点是我还是在懵的状态下。。 啊, 真的超级无敌paiseh咯!! 还要在第一年的后辈们面前出丑tim。。 下午和一个第二年的后辈上课的时候他还要问我早上是不是在发梦哦? 炸到下==! 
而且而且!!!!
那天早上那个聚会结束后, 其他的韩国人要进那一班上课的, 当我推开门出去的时候,突然有个男子用韩文跟我打招呼, 我傻了一下看着他, 然后再看到他后面的人,突然才想起是我的personal TA 啊!!!!! 够力, 我跟他们两个一起单独做了几次的实验还竟然记不住他们的脸, 我真的快要疯了!!!! 一个早上发生了那么多paiseh 的事情咳~~~
真的不知道头脑记不得一大堆的事情到底是好事还是坏事, 所以要和我一直保持联络, 不然我想我真的会想不起你的名字还有事情等等了~ 哈哈哈, 因为那天我突然间整理着照片看到了一张就照片, 而我竟然也忘记了我初恋的名字!! 而且也差点忘了原来他有和我一起见过我的挚爱们~~ 
那天cheah讲他忘记他前女友的名字的时候我还说他那里可能讲好意思忘记, 原来我真的酱好意思忘记~ 被传染了><!!! 真的会一时想不起来他突然叫什么了, 然后翻翻facebook还有insta的时候又突然间记回了~ 呵呵,我想我真的笑了~




写这篇的目的就是想要看过些时间会不会突然记得起另外一个题目?
答案是真的记不起来啊!!!!!!!!!!! 惨~

Thursday 13 March 2014

Osaka trip 2013~

终于把所有在日本的照片都传进了电脑里~
自己都差不多快要忘记这么一个美好的回忆了真的!
 其实我有点想不起来到底我们去了哪里~
但是,其实只要跟自己的朋友在一起, 
我想不是在于到底去了哪里, 
而是这段旅程把我们之间的感情升华了, 
这就是旅行最美好的回忆^^

接下来就看图说故事吧,
只是选了一些比较可以形容的~呵呵


 这是第一天到达osaka的晚上,
去了好像叫dontori的街上~
hmm~很多东西吃和很多东西看一下~ 
在这里还看到有个aqua在拉客。。

那天我们还吃了这个章鱼烧~
超级好吃!!
 我忘了我们是几时去的~
好像也是第一天我想是吧? ><!
如果那天没有下雨的话我想会好很多~


还有这个, osaka 的universal studio。。
很难忘记那天, 
因为天气真的冷到下起冰来, 
而且我们还要在outdoor排队等酱久~
可是忽略掉天气,overall还是很不错哈哈。。
晚上的parade, 我只能说日本游乐场的parade好像比韩国还要好看一点~
个人觉得啦, 超级多超级可爱。。




还有真人版cinderella~
 超级大的圣诞树!! 如果注意到傍边,其实全部都是灯照在建筑物上的假象~
而且还有很多日本人要求播出他们给彼此的祝福话~
看到有些是给朋友的, 给家人的也有给情人的~
其实还蛮sweet和浪漫下的^^
我最爱的青色 ~


然后我们还去了京都,
最著名的就是那里的庙~
 issh~没发现到我相机变成mf了,
所以焦点模糊去==!
 求姻缘的庙~
记得weihuan说过里面有两个石头, 
有个传说说如果你闭上眼睛, 心里想着一个人然后向前走,
如果能走到另外一个石头的话, 那个人就是你的姻缘~
其实我也很想试的咯, 只是那天人真的太多太多了~
所以只好打消这个念头。。
 京都很出名那个金金的庙,
我忘了叫什么, 只是记得好像在一休和尚里面出现过哈哈~
 这个effect很好^^

 日本人许愿的方式~


 不懂为什么, 其实我很喜欢这里, 
真的要亲眼看到才能感受到它的壮观真的~
 我的旅伴们~
兼导游的她~ 
这张照片是那里餐馆的老板帮我们拍的, 
重点是他真的很好笑,叫我拿着那个雨伞, 
说这样才美(那个雨伞还是从隔壁桌子摘下来的)。。
巴士站牌, 很cute咧~
本来都没注意到,后来看清楚才发现的~
得意咯 ;p
我们也有机会见到阿朱的朋友~
照片里的是以前在intec就见过了,
还有一些没在照片里的是他的junior们~


 日本另外一个特点, capsule room~
价钱便宜,又有自己的私人空间。。
真的很不错咯~
一个人的位置。。
还有电视在里面。。
这件是一间面店,好像很出名下~
连我这个不吃面的人都觉得真的很好吃~ 
可想而知真的有几好吃, niam niam~
自己可以选要怎样的口味、调料等等~

还有一样很喜欢日本食物的就是,
他们的鸡蛋!!
天啊~~~~~~
这个鸡蛋还好, 有些没拍到~
真的是那个蛋黄, 超级超级超级大超级好吃的半生熟~
从来都没有看过那样子的蛋黄, 没熟还是能够保持一粒的形状~
而且味道跟我们平时吃的有点不一样!
 忘了这个是什么, 好像是什么牛类的~

 这个, 有点像muachi, 又有点像떡没有味道的,
可是加上那个酱就还不错~
hmm~ 这个, 我也是忘了好像是看到店的布置很特别才进来的~


在日本还要做的事情就是拍这些大头贴~
因为会自动把我们的眼睛变大哈哈
最好的证据, 我的眼睛够夸张哈哈哈~






我想, 这就是我的osaka之旅吧?
很庆幸能够履行我之前所许下的诺言, 
更开心的就是就算我们不常联络, 
但我们还是能够和以前在intec时一样,
希望我们友谊能一直这样保持不变~
;)

Wednesday 12 March 2014

I wonder am i the only one who feel all of these?
the longer I stay here, i intend to lost my passion more for a place so called "Korea"..
I cant figure out why the people here being so mean wtf..
They will never thought of you and being so so so self-centered..
tried so hard before and i ended up with nothing.

guess this will be another emo night for me~~
argh............~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


my deep condolence to my aunt family~
heard from my sis that my aunt's husband passed away suddenly during his dinner~
a sudden strike for me again the night~
human life is just too short to have regret... 
I wont hesitate doing things start from now on~ 
never want to leave this world before getting what i want!!!
and also never want to leave before expressing all my love to my loves one! 
This is a must do list for my life!










stuck in the middle way of writing my KOREAN essay!!
it's not an easy task really!!




"Cause I'm only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I'm only human
And I crash and I break down
Your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart
'Cause I'm only human"

think of this song suddenly hahahahahah~~
relieve my stress ing....

Tuesday 4 March 2014

I love you, but I’m not in love with you

An Open Letter To My Ex: How A Best Friend Becomes A Stranger
SEX •  • 
Sometimes breaking up isn’t too difficult. Sometimes you know the person is entirely wrong for you. You know that it would never work because you never achieved that level of intimacy necessary to build a lasting relationship. You never became best friends.
Then there are times when breaking up is the most difficult thing in the world, not just because you know that you are breaking your lover’s heart – and your own while you’re at it – but because you are willfully choosing to lose your best friend.
There is nothing worse than choosing to let go and move on when you know that your best friend will never be more than just that, a best friend. It’s a very difficult phenomenon to describe, which is why most go with the all-time favorite cliché: “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.”
The truth is, that is the best way to describe it: You love someone deeply and feel that you ought to be part of each others’ lives, but not in the capacity that you have been thus far. Unfortunately, not everyone can break up and stay friends. In fact, I’d say most couldn’t. That is why we lose our best friends. We lose the people who are most important to us and, let’s be honest, end up lost for a good moment afterwards ourselves.
With time, however, we learn to pick up the pieces and redefine our direction in life. Yet, not all of us completely move on. Some of us still hold on to that friendship even though it is long gone. Why? We do love them. We wish they could be part of our lives. But at the same time we understand that is impossible. So what else is there to do than to write them a letter we’ll never send?

Hey there, stranger.
It’s been a very long time, which I’m sure you’re aware of. I’d like to say that it was your decision alone to keep this distance, but I think we both know it was for the best. I’d like to say that I’m glad you are well, but as we both know I have absolutely no idea how you are. The one thing that can definitely be said is that when we cut ties, we leave no strand behind, but slice right through until we no longer remember how to find each other. It’s amazing to think that once we were inseparable, the best of friends.
You knew me inside and out, and I, you. We were there for each other in the best of times and through the most difficult of times. We definitely managed to put each other through hell on occasion, but when support was needed the most, support was given. Until, of course, that final day. I sometimes find myself wondering why we couldn’t stay in touch. Would it be so bad if we got together for coffee from time to time? Or if we gave each other a ring to see how the other was doing?
Using the phone to make calls has become archaic, but surely we could send a text to wish each other a happy birthday? Or a happy New Year? I mean, we’ve been through so much. You are a part of my life and there is nothing I can do to ever change that.
You can’t be forgotten because forgetting you would be like forgetting myself — impossible. But then again, maybe you are right. Maybe we are better off as far apart as possible. We know we aren’t right for each other. We know it would never work, and we know the friendship we have — we had — created a bond that would make slipping back into romance too easy. It would make repeating the same mistakes too likely, repeating the same heartbreak certain. That’s what it really comes down to: It’s not my heart that I’m worried about, but yours. Breaking my own heart would be my responsibility to bear, but I can’t once again be responsible for breaking yours.
So all that I can do is wish you the best. Wish you a great, bright, loving future. Wish you to find the lover of your dreams and to create a lifetime of your fantasies. I wish for you to find a friend as great as me, but a much better partner. One who won’t drag you through the mud. One who you won’t feel the need to bury with guilt. I wish you all the best and although you will never read this, although we will never speak to each other again, and although you are out of my life forever, I wish you nothing short of happiness.
Never again to be yours, 
Your Lost Best Friend
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
found this when a friend of mine shared it and i think it is indeed true~ I couldn't agree more that the worst feeling is not when we trying to let go of the love one but again we are trying to let go one of the most important best friend in our lives as well~ it really hurts more........... 


p/s 1 : throwback when i was lost in my own campus on the first day during my final year  ><!  damn embarrassed that i need to ask help from a korean guy as if i was one of the newbie in uni..  wondering why i always have no sense of direction ==! wish i can upgrade my brain sometimes....
p/s 2 : i'm trying to settle things on my own way.. i think it's the best way of showing my rejection.. hate when people keep forcing me to do things that i don't like.. 

Monday 3 March 2014

Saturday 1 March 2014

2014韓國第一天

剛剛回到宿舍~ 
2014回到韓國的第一天~ 真的很累~
本來並不想update先的~ 
但是剛剛突然發現一件事情把我嚇到整個人都醒了!

話說今天早上我回到韓國機場的時候, 
lw竟然也在機場~(他要送其他batch9 的senior機)
一大早就真的嚇到我, 還醬好帶了那時情人節說要送我的巧克力~
因為巴士來了,還沒來得及反應就匆匆忙忙拿了他的袋子趕上車~
不懂爲什麽就是這樣, 每次他給我東西我都會嚇到傻掉, 
然後不會拒絕再來就後悔拿了他的東西~
在巴士上, 打開袋子的那一瞬間, 
我真的。。。
原來不止巧克力, 還有一個dreamcatcher和一件衣服~
本來那時候只看到一張卡片的~ 
我都不敢看完。。 就丟回進去袋子裡了~
回到宿舍就沒再動過那袋子的東西~

中午就和朋友出去了一直到晚上12點才回來~
重新整理東西才發現,
原來不止一張卡片, 
是兩張!!!!!!!!!!

我真的不知道要怎樣咧現在~ 
看到內容, issh.....
不知道要怎樣respond~



我應該要如何拒絕他? 理由是什麽? 雖然總是覺得順其自然就好, 
但我好像沒有那樣快要開始另外一段感情咧~ 
不知道, 沒有心理準備呱? 還是其他理由? 可能都有吧? 
有時候真的很討厭自己學不會拒絕!

==========================================================
暫時跳過。



見了久違的jb~ 畢業了,
時間過得真的很快咧~
我都已經final year了><!
哈哈, 我覺得我們很好笑咧,
明明隔壁的機器8000won 就能print 2張, 
我們竟然沒看到, 浪費了7000won只得這一張T.T

超級喜歡這樣^^ 




返回韓國的emo樣子~
真的想到開學就頭痛~!!